I have come to learn that D is a mirror. Actually, that all men/partners/friends/lovers are mirrors and they all reflect back the qualities of you which they see and believe. G and S reflected all my neurosis back on to me, leading me to believe I was nuts. But D reflects my goodness, my value. I’ll say something like, “I’m an underachiever,” and he’ll say, “No you’re not. You have accomplished this goal and that goal and this one and that one.”

“Oh,” I say. “You’re right.”

I’ll tell him I’m not as pretty as I’d like to be. He’ll say, “but I see only beauty in you.”

I’ll apologize for being a bitch. “I’m a bitch!” I say.

“I don’t think you are,” he’ll tell me. “You might get upset in certain circumstances, but you’re not a bitch.”

D allows me (and sometimes forces me) to see a more normal, healthy perspective on myself and the world around me. Not that he’s perfect! But he definitely has a healthier perspective on life and love. And while I tend to fall back into my old ways of negative thinking sometimes, he brings me back to all the positive work I’ve been doing on myself lately. I love him more for that.

This journey has definitely been an exciting one. It’s not without it’s problems, but it seems any problem I have it is OUTSIDE the relationship I have with D. There is NO INTERNAL STRUGGLE. ONLY PEACE and the occasional misunderstanding that gets resolved in minutes. It will be 7 months on the 15th and we’ve only had one mild disagreement about paint. How exciting is that?