Very sad today. Feeling sorry for myself. Though I know I shouldn’t. Need to get back into Step work, but I am at a standstill. Don’t want to put in the effort. Sick of facebook. Sick of work. Kids are being nasty. My eight-year-old wants to run away. He’s been really pushing my buttons, so I yelled at him this morning before school. And he basically yelled back, I hate this place! I want to leave!

Depressed. In pain every time I think of S. I miss him terribly. But i’m not so sure that’s “real.” How can you miss someone who doesn’t love you or want you? 

Anyway, this is going to be short. I have a lot of little tasks around the house to do and cannot afford to waste too much time on line today.