Many years ago I learned the true consequences of boundaries. That they didn’t always feel right or good when I created them or kept them in place to protect me. In fact, a time or two, they even made me feel miserable. But they did the job they were supposed to do–protect me and ultimately, help me find a healthy partner.

When I was dating P (from The Break-Up Journal) back in 2008, I had done a lot of work on myself prior to meeting him and so, I felt as though I was in a good place to date healthily. I decided, long before meeting him, that I would put up the boundary “no drugs.” The last guy  I dated (C) smoked pot daily and it interfered greatly in our relationship. I don’t like drugs. I have an aversion to them. I don’t understand when people are like, “hey…